If you’re like most parents, you want nothing more than to provide your children with a college education. Some have been saving since before their children were even born, but more often than not, a substantial number of parents find themselves in the uncomfortable position where their kids are fast-approaching college age, but they themselves are staring their retirement years right in the face. So the question becomes: should you sacrifice your retirement savings to put your kids through school?

In answering this dilemma, we need to consider the fact that while college-bound kids can always get financial aid, there is no such thing as “retirement aid.” And while it’s a nice wish, paying for a child’s education is not an obligation; and it’s certainly not worth taking out a second mortgage, cashing in a life insurance policy, or tapping into your IRA. Those funds can never be replaced, but your children will earn their own money — and will probably be even more compelled to achieve if they contribute a large part of their education costs themselves. They are less likely to allow this money to go to waste, and their education might simply mean more to them than to kids whose parents paid for it entirely.

As in the proverbial airplane safety measure of putting your oxygen mask on first before you help your neighbor, it is prudent to take care of yourself before you raid your retirement accounts and assets to fund your children’s education. They’ll certainly survive — and perhaps even thrive — knowing it’s something they’ve earned. Armed with an education, they’ll enter the workforce and establish their own retirement funds. With lifespans steadily increasing, your retirement could conceivably last upwards of 30 years, so ensuring you have the funds to support a long retirement means you won’t become a “burden” to your children, relying on them for shelter, money or care. And if this were to happen, what was all your sacrifice for in the first place?

Keep your nest egg, encourage your children to achieve, and with a solid planning strategy and a bit of luck, you’ll lead a long, happy retirement — one that allows you to spend time doing what you love with those you love.